Mother

At the bathroom sink I see you
Dabbing your eyes in the mirror
Running mascara
Mess in the wastebasket
You don't know I am watching you

Vacant look in your eyes
You twist the cap off the bottle
Maybe the pills will fill the emptiness this time

Makeup, curling iron, eyeliner pencils, hairclips
Strewn all over the counter
You still don't know I see you
Back into your bedroom
Sink your head into your hands
Perched on the edge of the bed

There's no more fighting now
No more shouting now
Daddy's gone away for good this time
11 years old, I have to become the man of the house
I don't miss him or his violent rage
But I'm not sure what's going to happen now that he's gone

I know where the gun under the bed is
I know there are bullets in the chamber
Daddy showed it to me before he left
I know Mom knows where it is too
Every day the fear, the image
Races through my brain
That maybe she might use it

The little boy that is me
Watches quietly
As the unpredictable force of nature
My mother
For once is not angry
For once is not loud
For once is not hurting me
But when she is alone
When all else is stripped away
All that is left is her despair

And the little boy that is me
Knows even then
That to hurt me so much
She must hurt a lot too.

Welcome

"Like magick, writing is a craft: it takes intention and skill, and we do it with our own hands, fueled by the power and vitality that drives our souls...For me, these two worlds have become almost inseparable. What is writing, after all, if not magick? A scribe picks up a pen (or sets fingers to a keyboard) and transmits intangible thoughts, ideas, and perceptions into symbols on a page. Something ethereal seeps from the imagination into the plane of reality, where it takes on a life of its own. Once formed, letters and words are heavy with substance and purport and intention, not only in literal terms but in their human history; the very act of writing forges new links in an ancient chain. Humans have used the tools of their times - mud tablets, quills, fountain pens, laptops - to engage in the task of creating symbols that move readers to emotion and inspiration, even to dreams."

- Susan Pesznecker, "Crafting Magick With Pen and Ink"

Hello friends, and welcome to Sorcery of the Pen, a blog in which I will explore my personal practices of writing and witchcraft in depth. Join us as we traverse and push the boundaries of liminal space, time and consciousness, and explore the vast, uncharted landscape of the soul. I am entering into this project with the firm, set intention that this blog will act as a tool to radically transform my life (and you, the reader, if that is what you desire), break down barriers, and explode the limits of what I ever dreamed was possible. I believe in miracles, because my life up to this point has been a steady procession of miraculous and often utterly inexplicable events. What do you wish to see happen most in your life? What are your hopes, dreams and most dearly-kept desires? Buckle up - I have a feeling this just might be a wild ride.

~ Daniel